RON MALY HAS BEEN WATCHING THE PARADE GO BY FOR A LONG TIME. THIS IS ONE OF HIS WEBSITES.

Sunday, September 1, 2013

My neighbor Al, the health nut, was at the front door late this afternoon, saying he was in need of a cup of Italian Dark Roast. "You seem to be in a festive mood," I told Al. "Damn right," he answered. "I'm still celebrating UNI's victory last night over the Clones. It used to be whenever we beat Iowa State, it cost the Clones their coach. I remember when Terry Allen used to beat Jim Walden, then ol' Jimbo was toast shortly thereafter. But, actually, I feel good just winning last night's game. I didn't want it to cost a coach or an athletic director his job at Ames." And, really, ISU is my second-favorite team. I root for 'em in every game, unless they're playing UNI." Al didn't go to the Panthers' 28-20 victory last night, but listened on the radio. "I was anxious to see what they said about it on the late-night TV news," he said, "but got a little upset when I heard what the channel 8 announcer said. "What did he say, Al?" I asked. "Oh, hell, he was crying and screaming that Iowa had already lost to Northern Illinois earlier in the day,and that if Iowa State didn't beat UNI neither of the 'state' schools would be victorious. I guess he forgot that UNI is a state school, too." I asked Al who the announcer was. "I don't know, some clown who probably got his diploma from DMAAC," Al said. "He was one of the weekend announcers, of course, and he'll no doubt be on again tonight. Come to think of it, I now remember that the guy's name was Reister or Rooster. "Well, I know they've go t a guy named Scott Reister there. If it wasn't him you heard, I'm sure he'll let me know. I'd advise you to cool off, Al," said. "Be happy your team won. And, by the way, there's nothing wrong with DMAAC. They turn out good students over there." Before he finished his coffee, Al said he wasn't happy about what he read in the paper about the UNI-ISU game. "I always read the rag at Hy-Vee, and got pissed the minute I saw the headline on page 1," he said. It read, STATE OF SHOCK--Cyclones Suffer Stunning Home Loss At the Hands Of Northern Iowa." I said, "What did you expect, Al? Newspapering is a dead business, and so is the product."