Word has leaked that, because of a recent happening, the paper commissioned the Iowa Poll to do an off-the-wall survey. As is the case with everything else done by the Iowa Poll, the survey was totally unscientific. In other words, you can either believe it or not believe it--which is the situation with most other things in the paper. Anyway, I am told that the Iowa Poll asked residents of this state if they would want the paper's Daniel P. Finney and/or his stablemate, Roland H. Thompson to write their obituaries. An astounding 98 percent said they would not want either Finney or Thompson, who are connected at the hip and perhaps other places, to write anything about either their deaths or their lives. They say both reporters have extremely checkered pasts, and consequently cannot be trusted with any writing project. The Iowa Poll added a second question to this week's survey, asking if people in this state would like to write the obituaries of Finney and Thompson. An overwhelming 99.5 percent said they would welcome the opportunity.